Saturday, December 1, 2012

December it is

I am in dilemma. Yes, it's already December, that means, 2012 is coming to an end, and there comes another new year. I feel like I haven't accomplished most of the stuff I wanted to do before the year ends, or simply putting it, I have't done anything rather productive! What on Earth was I doing during the past eleven months?

They said the world will end this December on the 21st. That did not frighten me. The only thing I'm afraid of is not finishing my list of things to do for the year. Time flew by so, so, so quickly that I thought I just woke up yesterday to the year 2012! Nonetheless, I'll keep doing whatever it takes to check my soon-to-be 2013 to-do list. Until now, I'm just clueless, CLUELESS.

Assignments to be done, and finals coming up, I am exhausted. I guess it's mostly due to the fact that I procrastinate a lot, like really, a lot. I keep telling myself to get up and work but something deep inside me, the deep unconscious mind, is telling me to relax. That's really bad, I know. But I just couldn't help it. So, what resulted now is loads of work waited to be completed.

I wanna brush up my French. That was the first thing I told myself, in fact, I jot it down on my checklist in BOLD. But what I got now, almost eleven months later was, nothing. My French did not get any better, however it got worse. I'd forgotten most of the vocab I've learned. Sad isn't it? Nonetheless it's really hard to master a language when you don't have someone to speak to. Like any other languages. And this thing is definitely gonna make its second appearance on the checklist for 2013 again.

And I think that is also one of the main reasons I wanted to study in Montreal, Canada. They speak French and English there, fair enough, they have relatively low tuition compared to France and the U.S., and the cost of living is just fairly lower than in Europe. However they have an accent, which I kind of like. Unlike French French, Quebec French is more rustic, I would say, or sound more lazy and rural, just like how Malaysian/Singaporean Chinese differs from Chinese Chinese. Like major differences in pronunciation in a way that the French French wouldn't comprehend their Canadian counterparts.

Other than that, just some stuff related to college or myself down the list. Omfg.

Peace out :)

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Things change, changes things

Yup. I was just here talking about Starbucks and the other day I went and found something rather astonishing, and unfortunate, and creepy like they've heard what I said. "Seats are for Starbucks customers only", when I saw this I was like "Oh God Why", ya know the meme.

Things happen to change somewhere in between the period of our lifetime. Like how they'd decided to throw people out when you don't buy their stuff. I've grown taller than ever, having people to wonder what I've done to myself during my years in high school. I became more confident with myself and sure of my goals I have to meet. I changed my computer platform from Windows XP to a Macintosh during school. I had my hairstyle changed to some mohawk spikes and now back to my original hair (which I like better). I changed my mind from wanting to study in Australia to going to the U.S., and now Canada. My cousins said I'd changed a lot since we last met, which I don't really remember, and the list goes on and on...

Almost everything in life you've experienced, yet to encounter or not anticipating for, it will somehow come to a point where you face massive metamorphosis that would make you reorder your life. One day you may like how your backyard looks after a day of hard work remaking everything, a flood, or a hurricane may decide to come interfere and waste all those hard effort put in. And the next day, you find your backyard in a mess and swear to never step a foot in there again.

Let's not talk about these. College. It is now a very crucial time for me - to decide my major, and I know, I'm very clear that every decision I make now would totally directly, if not indirectly affect how the rest of my life would look like. I have a picture of my dream life. It will be not really luxurious but good enough to maintain a quality lifestyle. A job with a reasonably deserving high pay and sufficient to take care of my parents. This is what I want. I would also want to start a business venture of my own a few years after in the field. That's what I really want. But all that seems so hard.

I know and am very certain that nothing, absolutely nothing comes falling from the sky. There ain't no free lunches on Earth. And this, I think that's what, which makes it meaningful. You work for something and that something will yield a better something, perhaps a bigger and more superb one. It works the same to achieving anything.

My major and field of study is the most mind-boggling decision I have to ever make, but there are tons of other stuff to worry about later in life. So this is just small matter for years to come, until now, to me it's a massive live-or-die thing. I have yet to come to a firm choice as to major in ____ or ____ or ____, but I still applied and hoping for that when I open my mailbox I see an admission letter sent to me saying that I'm in! Need some more positive energy for this one here!

Seems like I'm going off topic, but nope, all those stuff I said are also related to change. I'm somehow like predicting those changes that might happen to me, in my life, in few years time. I'm making a decision that will ultimately alter every single detail, or atom, inside me. And those anticipation, let me tell ya, it ain't fun at all. But, there's always a but to everything, I could just fill myself with more of those positiveness and I'll make it through and get what I'd desired. You too! You could make it through for sure!

Positive vibes,
Peace out ;-)

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Wannabes much?

Does doing what others do make us wannabes? Wearing the same, exact clothes as those guys around the curb, on the sidewalk, in Starbucks? I think they're called hippies, but I don't have a clear picture of what the word "hippie" stands for. It's like suddenly everyone's wearing H&M.

Starbucks. The place where people hangout and have coffee, talk, chat, but what happens to be recently, more like get a Frappuccino, find a seat, out goes the iFamilies, and yeah. Not stereotypical, I personally hangout at Starbucks a lot. With friends, alone, rushing on assignments or just reading, or people-gazing, or just yeah, daydream whatever, but mostly without ordering any drinks, coz you're not obliged to, plus the baristas wouldn't throw you out if you don't. I come here for their power supply and WiFi, maybe a little bit of the ambience when I'm out on the go (usually at college).

I order my regular iced tall double soy latte, which is technically out off the menu, in lieu I always see people ordering a grande green tea frap, or chocolate cream frap, I mean it's your drink don't you need some customizations or you're just trying to be like everyone else who comes to Starbucks, order a drink coz everyone does, and show off your iDevices coz everyone has one (or two). Or in short wannabes. I do sometimes consider myself a wannabe with the fact that I buy clothes from Uniqlo and H&M but that doesn't make me look like a complete idiot, coz seriously, they've got some really decent clothes.

My point is, people are constantly caught to the idea that they have to be what they think society wants them to be. For example, you wouldn't be deemed cool if you don't own an iPhone or don't wear H&M, or don't go to Starbucks, which those mammoth multinationals win in their ads and makes tons of money out of these people. I can't really judge people, especially when they like their coffee the way it is out of the menu, or feels more comfortable dressing like the mannequin in store windows. 

What only matters at the end of the day is to be your original self. Be who you are, not who they are. But the problem in this world is, everyone is brainwashed with overrated celebrities in commercials and mainly material things. Materialism is the word. That includes me :)

Peace out.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Fair is fair

Living in this world, you'll probably see some people being born with more advantages and more opportunities than others. Like, a child raised in a wealthy family and another being raised in poverty. Well, being said that, you can easily get those two children into different paths, for instance, a rich kid who doesn't have to worry about anything, not even a single f given, while a poor kid has to worry about school, family problems and all sorts. What's more a child from a poor family has to worry about not having enough money to pay for college, finding a job and so on. 

So it makes sense no? Wealthy kids just live the life whereas poor children live the day. It is so true it can't be truer. Some people are just blessed with more advantages than others. It can't be denied. Life is unfair, yes. But let's think. We are probably one of the fortunate few millions who are still living in this world, while others die of hunger in poorer places. So why complain and hate how unfair the world is treating you, instead, embrace it. Be grateful for what you've got but others don't. Be thankful for all you're blessed with. 

And I'm the one of the few fortunates to not having to worry about college or money, though not rich enough to live like a royalty. I'm thankful for that I'm given just the right amount of advantages to live with. Seriously.


Friday, July 20, 2012

Keep Calm And Carry On

Howdy y'all! Nope. It sounds stupid :)

I've been busy with college work, assignments, and finally finished my exams this week. So happy to feel free again, and it is summer time, everything just sounds more fun! But, sadly, summer for me means getting a job but it is a no-obligation. I could choose not to. However, it is also for my own good to gain some more experience.

And yet, again, I'm here thinking about some mind-boggling issues. What I really want to do after college? Get a job in my field, or as suggested, join my family business and soon take it over? I know everything, every single thing, or achievement on Earth requires hard work. And I know this works for everything. You can't expect something beautiful to just pop out of your garden if you don't work to plant those seeds. Nothing can be earned without hard work.

I knew it. I have to earn a good GPA in college, and for that, I will have to get up and work hard. I've also been taught at home that everything has to be earned. I got my brand new computer by working for my Mom at her office as an admin clerk doing all sorts of work around the place, as it goes the same with my phone. I earned it. And I'm satisfied with what I'm blessed and given. I'm grateful that I'd actually worked for all I have. I guess that was a good parenting technique my parents used in raising me.

But still, I'm kinda pressured by them too. As all parents do, they always lecture me if not about my results, it would be about my future job. I might get frustrated with all that lengthy talks, but I know it's for my own good. They like pressuring me to get a good GPA, which I am sure I would, and what's more, talking to me about my future career, which eventually, too I would! Trust me all parents are like that, not only Chinese parents :)

Looking at people dying, suffering from poverty and watching people doing hard chores around the city, I know I'm blessed with abundance in every aspect. I have nice and loving parents, stubborn but awesome sisters and college which my parents afforded me. I couldn't ask for more, but just do the best out of my life. And lastly I would like to thank this friend who kinda re-introduced me to this very quote I had adopted wrote some time ago. Cheers :)

Thursday, May 24, 2012

I'm very certain

Massive uncertainties has dragged me to what I call now as my life with lost of directions. I've been in college for soon-to-be three semesters now, but I'm still not firm of what I want to do for the rest of my life. Giving that in mind that what I choose to major right now would somehow, if not entirely affect my life, career, whatever it is related. I'm in crisis, at least that's what I'm only clear of.

Choosing a Computer Science major over a Business major is really challenging, but the other way round, it's too risky. As I learned from most people associated with my life that a Business major is a waste of time, they said. As of right now, I have not even gone half way through the requirements mandatory for a Computer Science major transfer student. Okay, enough of negative thoughts...

After being inspired by The Magic, written by Rhonda Byrne, I thought instead like this: though I'm really confused at this moment, at least I've got some time, two months time to decide what I wanna do with my life. 

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

quote of da day #33: Creativity is intelligence having fun

The Problem with Obesity

I recently came to notice that Malaysia is full of obese people. Yes I said OBESE. I don't know why but I could hardly see any fit and healthy humans in this place - Malaysia. Every where I go, I see enormous people with a huge tummy hanging there. All I could say, this is really unhealthy! So, where did all the healthy people go? I couldn't agree more, and I'm not stereotypic or nothing, they be in the gym. They look more like the average humans from the Paleolithic Ages.

People who workout or maybe just exercise frequently at the gym, and of course eating a healthy diet, tend to be fit. They're well toned and they look healthier! But why? Look, joining a gym is unreasonably expensive for most people, given that the income they earn (minimum wage RM900?) is obviously not enough. Secondly, healthy foods, like organic groceries, are double the price of normal stuff. A pack of organic spinach will inevitably cost you a nice 8 MYR. I mean, it is way out of the average grocery list spending. Moreover, the cost of living in KL is high, yes it is high, usual grocery shopping will cost you about 100 MYR, how could the average income earners afford organic groceries?

Let alone groceries. Let's talk about eating out. Having a lunch at Subway Sandwich Bars would cost you a reasonable 7.5 MYR, well what about having a salad? A simple salad could cost you 12.5 MYR !!! What the hell? Too bad but a burger at McDonald's only sets you back for a nice 4 MYR from your wallet. So, you gonna have a salad or a burger? You know the answer when your pocket's real tight.

Now, do you see why the obese people? Expensive gym memberships, costly organic foods and crazily cheap McDonald's burger. I couldn't agree more that these facts are the main reasons to obesity in this place. So what you gonna eat today?

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

quote of da day #32: Life's path

Reality equals motivation

The old days had gone and in four years time, I'm about to open the doors to the outside world, the realistic and competitive world, look for a job with my bachelor's degree and live a different life from what I'm practically enjoying now. It is very challenging just by thinking of job interviews... I fear interviews. These unusual thoughts started to cross my mind almost everyday before I go to bed. And, by saying unusual, I meant that I didn't ever had a thought about it before, ever.

What is more scary than to face reality? I guess nothing. Reality is there, we will have to face it one day, good or bad. Try thinking like this, if you wanna find a path with no obstacles, it probably wouldn't lead you anywhere. The obstacles down our road are the realities of the world we would face. Looking from another point of view, the obstacles we faced are like small little hints or rather, directions, giving us guidance along our path. When the very little hints we accumulated teach us as we go, like how we learn from our mistakes, obviously it is gonna lead us to a bright new start.

Now, reality seems to be a good form of motivation huh. 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Knowing something by not knowing how you know

Life as we know it, faith counts. There are many irrationalities in life, but all we could ever do is to follow and live as it goes by. Recently, I came through a point of life where you have to literally dig your minds and think of what you want to do after college, and before that, what to major in. I am in an American Bachelor's degree program, as you know it, I'll be given two years of time to practically think of what to major in. I sat back and thought. I stopped thinking, because I was totally blank, real blank.

I've already completed exactly one-third of my two years here at HELP University, two semesters out of six to be exact. And guess what? I still have no idea at all what I really wanted to do. People have too much desires to accomplish, like me, I was thinking even before I enrolled into college. Maybe a computer engineer, or a business person, or maybe a writer? Photographer sounds good, too. Seriously, how many things could you do?

And here comes irrationalities (I love using this word). Sometimes, I would think of doing stupid stuff. Oh, and not to mention work loads, lots of them. Parents having high hopes on me is killing me too! I have to look for a job with a criteria, high pay. But what about my own desires, if I have one, one and only one. I couldn't imagine working on a job which I have no interests in at all. So, am I doomed or what? Finishing high school early and ended up in college earlier than anyone else?

But I tried thinking on the bright side, this is the time of my life to start thinking, some serious critical thinking I guess. I'll have to plan for my major, if not majors, and a major relating to what I really wanted to do. Plus, having a double major is always better than just having one. Or maybe, I would, some day, know what is best for me even by not knowing how I knew it - Blink, Malcolm Gladwell. And it all might come a long, long way.

Monday, March 26, 2012

The Different People

As usual, I sit at Starbucks, trying to finish my work, but ended up got hooked by Twitter, Facebook, and countless other sites. I blame the free Wifi service they provide here, but without it, I can't imagine having my work done two hours before class. 

Sitting there looking around, I see different people, doing different but somehow similar things - socialize. In the different ways, there are people who communicate through the web, cell phones, and iPads. While others, prefer sitting face-to-face looking each other into their eyes and start talking for hours and hours, renewing their cup of coffee after every round. In fact, each and everyone of them has their own way of socializing. We are different and distinguishable, even twins, which is what made us all unique.

We are born with different looks, sizes, heights, backgrounds and almost anything you can think of. But most important of all, it is our individual personalities that counts. Different personalities makes different people, which we had, or maybe would meet in the near future. These different people step into our lives and could somehow alter the way our life was meant to be. But let it be in a good way or a bad one, we may have times when we face depression and everything just doesn't seem to go right, and times when everything seems finer than pure gold.

It is just a matter of perspective when viewing a situation, good or bad, it tells you which direction or step we should take next, right or wrong. When we take a step forward and continue with our life, we may turn back and think how sad I was before, and we'll know that some things change, it may go worse, but it is surely for the better.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

The Language Enthusiast

this is a Latin manuscript (which I have no idea whats it about)

I have this all-time obsession with languages since small. I never thought of how I started speaking, but I knew that language is a part of us, which develops our mind, nurturing us and prepares us for our out coming. We may be monolingual, bilingual or trilingual, it never ends.

There are endless possibilities that we might be born to a father of half Chinese descent, considering they were from Southern China, where you could speak both Cantonese and Mandarin, and a third of Finnish, two thirds of Latin American descent. While maternally, you're a descendant of probably French and South African. Well, you do the math. How many languages could you possibly be speaking? Cantonese Chinese, Mandarin Chinese, Finnish, Spanish, French and Afrikaans? That sounds impossible right? But yeah, c'est possible.

Learning a new language, or foreign, is like discovering a new side of you. You get in touch with new cultures, new people, new ideas, and when everything adds up, it's just a new perspective on how you view life. Or at least, play with something new, instead of hanging on to a monotone, "English".

I first started off with French, for no reasons, I just learned French. Then, slowly, right now, I get to pick up from where I left Spanish off, and also attempting to pick up German. I've tried Japanese, but not really into it. Mandarin? Hmm, I could still remember most of the characters, and I think thats good enough :)

Sometimes, some of my friends, or even family criticize a lot on me learning a language. They're like, "What can you do on learning French, or Spanish, or German, or Japanese?" To me, it's no big deal! Learning a new language, is like inventing the light bulb. You'll definitely find ways to utilize it to its fullest. Who doesn't use light bulb now days? I mean, why do you learn English at the first place? It's like you knew you would use it some other day when you're just a new born? See what I mean?

Well, my last words, just ignore them whatsoever they said to you, if you're into it, go ahead and master it!


Tuesday, February 7, 2012

quote of da day #26: Friends

"A friend is one who knows you and loves you just the same."
- Elbert Hubbard

"A friend to all is a friend to none."
- Aristotle

Saturday, January 7, 2012


There was once when I had always asked myself, is money a big deal? When I was still a kid, maybe no. But then as grow, fifty bucks in my pocket seems like ten bucks when I was younger. It loses value. It's not that the currency depreciated, it's that, when we grow up, our wants becomes necessities, and expenses increase. We spend more and fifty bucks seems like no big deal now days.

But what if a ten thousand dollars went missing, and that is the person who you trust most who lose it? Now thats a big deal, for someone who has average income monthly. I would go mad if I was that person. I worked so effing hard for that ten thousand dollars, and now you lose it? I'm gonna kill you! Wait... did you lose it or you used it? *silence* WHERE DID THE MONEY GO??? I WOULD NEVER EVER FORGIVE FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE!

Let's hop on a hot air balloon, ignite the fire, and let the hot air rise, and push the thing up. It leaves the ground. And look down. Suddenly all you could see is a real-life world map. Everything seems so small down there. the roads are like lines you draw with pencil. People are as tiny as ants. And money, it could be said as almost invisible.

Things may mess up sometimes, but all we've gotta do is, to forgive. Ten thousand dollars looking from high up in the air is almost nothing, and why make everyone's lives more miserable with the "almost nothing"? Forgive is the act of demanding peace. Forgive someone is to forgive oneself. No matter right or wrong, what's done is already done, none of us could change the past. But all we could do is to forgive for the future.

Dedication to my dearest someone.